Mini hoovers and mild sexism on a Monday

My other half has a strange obsession with a number of odd websites. The first is which, whilst sounding like a mild porn website, is actually a haven for camera nerds that in particular provides riveting YouTube videos of really interesting men unwrapping really interesting packages that contain really interesting tripods, for example. Really. Interesting. The second (although by no means the last in this series of the Internet’s finest) is Hot UK Deals, or HUKD (… hooked… *sigh*). I regularly wake up in the morning to the breaking news that blueberries are now £2 for 400g at Morrisons, et cetera. I jest but in all fairness, it’s actually worth a visit if you’re planning on investing in a new TV, or a blender, or really just anything because you would not believe the amount of shit that gets posted on that site (or app, for ease of access when you’re out and about).

Last night, I was giving the prodigal other half a summary of the week’s gossip when I suddenly and unexpectedly realised he wasn’t paying much attention to what I was saying, which I was rather shocked at as he does normally really enjoy that sort of thing. When I investigated what had him glued to his phone, I have to admit I should have seen that flame icon coming. But upon further inspection, I came to understand and appreciate what all the hullabaloo was about. A post on the forum was advertising a Mini Robotic Vacuum Cleaner for £39.99, instead of the recommended retail price of £99.99. Now hold your horses, you’ll be pleased to know that’s not the exciting bit. Don’t all rush to Maplins at once. Before you go and form an orderly queue, take a minute to read up on the reviews for this less-than-average- sized cordless dust collector, and thank me later.

Because, ladies and gentlemen, rare were the comments regarding the vacuum cleaner’s ability to reach under coffee tables. Oh no. What had actually gone down on the thread’s comments was a battle of intense wit, sarcasm and sheer brilliance, the victor to be glorified forever more as holding the number one spot in the Top Comments section.

I must warn you: if you are at all sensitive towards mild sexism, you should probably stop reading now because you’re about to spontaneously combust if so. And of course, it’s a forum so please be aware that, in keeping with modern standards of cyber interaction, the comments have in places descended into threats of extreme violence and/or harsh but arguably true quips about the frankly abhorrent use of apostrophes by certain members. Putting to one side DJ1’s labelling of faheed2000 as a “feckless gollum” (brilliant), I’ll just leave you with a link to my most favourite review thread of all time, because it’s Monday and you might just need cheering up.